Although I have six children, Kristen and I have five children at home. Whenever we're out and about, we tend to get mixed reactions toward the size of our family. Many times we get this awful look, sort of like you just farted and made it awkward with the person you're interacting with, but have no idea who they are. Sometimes we get the "Really?!" response like we would lie about how many children we have just to get a reaction out of people. Sometimes we get the "awww" look, almost as if people are taken aback by our ability to care for so many children and not go insane.
But, the one response I love the most? "I come from a family with five children, and I loved it!" That's the response I remember the most often. Not the awkward ones, not the ones where people think we're crazy, and certainly not the ones where people make stupid remarks about how many girls we have. I love it when you run into someone who grew up with lots of siblings, but isn't 60-years old and lived on a farm (because the baby boomers had a lot of kids on the farm). Oddly enough, it's often the late-teens or early-twenty-somethings that are working for a living and just glow when they see someone come by with a big family.
The funny thing is, we're not even close to the only ones in the immediate area with 4-6 children. In fact, our children are friends with a family that has 6 children and were friends with a family that has 4 (but they moved away). We also used to have a family down the street from us that has 5 children and I know I've seen many, many mini-vans on the freeway with those silly family stickers that show 4 or 5 children.
When I was growing up in the 80s, large families didn't seem to be as common. Of course, I seem to recall both parents working being more common than it is today. I don't really know why this is, or if I was really only seeing such a small portion of life that I was oblivious to the big families. However, I do know that pretty much everyone I know nowadays that grew up during that era only has 1-2 siblings.
I would love to know what it would have been like to live in the 80s as a parent with 5 children. I'm sure I would be bombarded with horrible looks of shock and responses about how I must be crazy. Not that we don't get those now, I can just picture them being more frequent back then. But then, if you go back to the 50s, people probably wouldn't think twice about seeing a family with 5 children. I only think this because a lot of my friends' parents had 3-5 siblings. It kind of makes you wonder what changes from decade to decade that makes the number of children you have more or less socially acceptable.
I will say one thing, no matter what response we get, I don't think anyone has ever asked us why we have so many children. That would be a little awkward, because honestly it's no one's business but our own. Friends and family can ask those questions, but complete strangers? My reply would be... "What the fuck do you care?" Okay, maybe that's a little harsh. Maybe I would reply, "Because we farm them out for money to pay for our drug and expensive car habits." Yep, that would make them think twice about asking.
So why do we have such a big family? Simple; we love our children, we love being parents, we love new babies, and we love each other (that would be a reference to Kristen and I). Yeah it may be stressful at times and yes our grocery bill is ridiculously high, but I wouldn't have it any other way!
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